Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Dear Rihanna: An Open Letter

What's up, Ri Ri?

I could offer you encouragement, tell you that you're a role model for young girls, and beg you to re-think your reconciliation with Chris Brown, but I won't. I'm not concerned with the message you're sending young girls; pain ought to be enough to convince an abuse victim not to go back to their abuser. I don't think you signed up to do anything but entertain and give us something to dance to. Which brings me to the point of my letter -- I need to appeal to your business sense.

It's true that you have some hits under your belt (no pun intended), but your career soared only after you cut your hair, got "edgy", hooked up with a squeaky clean, adorable Chris Brown and morphed into this strong, beautiful bad girl. We love you because you LOOK fierce and we thought you WERE fierce. You photograph well. We love your image.

I have to wonder what will happen to your image after TMZ spots you out and about with Chris Brown. What do you think your fans think when we see how ready you are to accept Chris Brown back into your life? Tell me if I'm wrong, but I don't think he was digging you the night of the fight, and he damn sure aint doing nothing but disrespecting you now by play boxing, jet skiing, and smiling for the cameras only 3 weeks after man-handling that face. 2 lumps? A split lip? You forgot...? You think it can't happen again? You're OK if it does?

I'm mad at you, Rihanna. I'm disappointed like a Jehovah's Witness kid on Christmas morning. Don't you realize that if you take him back now your career will tank and his will level out and he'll be just fine? Let us not forget that Chris Brown is a TRIPPLE threat and he's handsome as hell too. But you're coasting on your image alone and you better preserve that thing like a precious artifact. You just can't afford to be this weak behind Chris Brown.

For your career's sake, can you just tell Chris Brown to Take a Bow? If it's meant to be, he'll get it together and you can hook up again in a few years. But now - now it's time to Beyoncefy your career and stop making all these dumb, passionate, career killing moves. (Beyonce would have put some make up on it and been at the Grammy's :-)).

So, the next time you want to cry about Chris Brown or take him back (or beg him to come back), try rehearsing a complicated dance move; take a vocal lesson; work on getting rid of your accent so you can act. You can't just let your delicate little career slip away, baby girl.

Take care of your BUSINESS, dammit.

In love,


  1. Ri Ri situation...I think she has the classic case of 'that boy' syndrome. this is my homemade syndrome describing 'that boy' that makes us women lose ALL types of rationale and common sense over what we think is true love. NOBODY can tell us ANYTHING when we are with 'that boy'. I know she is suffering from this also, because how else could one explain RiRi straight dissing and mooning the whole world with her 'reconciliation'?! SMH. The good news is the syndrome is usually seen in women's younger years and they simply grow out of it in time...at least I hope so. poor RiRi.

  2. I couldntve said it any better saved girl!

  3. The only problem is....most of us aren't celebs and we have the luxury of effing up at a young age without ruining our careers. Rihanna doesn't have that luxury. She better get it together!

  4. so true Smoke (and you know I am calling you Smoke on purpose...I feel I know you enough to nick your nickname, LOL). I consider myself lucky to not be a celeb for the very point you just made...to have one's life under constant scrutiny is awful. I think the only time I am envious of being a celeb is when I see them getting free perks and of course the deep pockets...can I get some big money to pay my bills off please?

  5. Well said! Your comment also.

  6. i heard that Rihanna might have been hit by an air bag, which reminds me, they haven't conclusively proven that Chris Brown assaulted her yet, right?

  7. Hi coffee... well, I only saw that airbag story one time, on Bossip. Nah, nothing's been proven, but I've finally accepted the fact that the cut lip and all that wasn't the result of a trip and fall. :-)

  8. I wonder if those wedding rumors are true. If they had a quickie wedding at puffy's crib I'm sure there was no time for a pre nup. Chris Brown may end up stuck taking care of rihanna for a minute when her career does tank. Thats if they don't end up killing each other. Rihanna is sounding really crazy with all that "I can't live without you" stuff.


Just say what you feel!