Monday, February 16, 2009

A Few Questions for Chris Brown Supporters



Update:

The Lovely B. Scott can say it better than I can:



I had a great weekend; not sure I can say the same for Chris Brown and Rihanna.

As we all know, Chris Brown released this statement:

Words cannot begin to express how sorry and saddened I am over what transpired. I am seeking the counseling of my pastor, my mother and other loved ones and I am committed, with God's help, to emerging a better person.

Much of what has been speculated or reported on blogs and/or reported in the media is wrong. While I would like to be able to talk about this more, until the legal issues are resolved, this is all I can say except that I have not written any messages or made any posts to Facebook, on blogs or any place else. Those posts or writings under my name are frauds.

Even after that statement black women are still saying, "I'm waiting on the facts to come out before I pass judgment." or "She must have done something to provoke him." Huh?

Girl, the facts are out. Rihanna been in hiding; Chris Brown's family has spoken out and no one is saying this is untrue -- they're saying he's a "good boy" and that one mistake shouldn't turn his fans away; Rihanna's family has admitted to bruising and that they apparently didn't really know Chris Brown; Rihanna is "well"; Chris Brown has all but admitted guilt in his official statement.

WHAT MORE DO YOU NEED?

I wonder what the Chris Brown supporters would say if they actually saw footage of him slamming his fists into Rihanna's face over and over. Because THAT is exactly what happened, allegedly. A 6 ft. 2 in. man got angry and made repeated face-to-fist connections with his Boo. Y'all down with that? Really?

It sounds like you are down for it because you aren't saying, "Chris Brown didn't do that." You're saying, "She must have provoked him."

If a female is bad enough to hit a male, she's bad enough to get a beat down from a male.

Oh ok. Let's apply that same logic to your daughter or your cousin or your niece. It might sound nice and "equal" coming out of your mouth when referring to Rihanna, but what about that niece who has the smart mouth? You want her 19 year old boyfriend to beat her up and leave her unconscious in the streets?

My niece wouldn't be in that situation.

You don't know what your niece is doing when she's with the boy you don't even know she's having sex with. So whatever.

I so wish ladies would stop tripping. ~sigh~ Why are you identifying with the abuser and blaming the victim? So what if she screamed and put her finger in his face, all I want to know is DID SHE BALL UP HER GROWN MAN FIST AND KNOCK THE ISH OUT OF HIM? If she didn't do that, then this isn't a FAIR FIGHT. That's like an unarmed woman in a wheelchair hitting me and I snap and push her down a hill. I mean damn -- what can she really do???

Why do black women identify with and support black men more than they identify with and support black women?

I was talking to an older lady today and she couldn't understand why Chris Brown would even give his number to another woman if he was in a relationship with Rihanna (we were wondering about the text that started it all). This lady was from another generation and she couldn't even understand the disrespect that Chris may have shown Rihanna just by giving another woman his phone number. I had to let her know that men have moved on to all kinds of blatant disrespect and abuse. Making plans with other women via a cellphone is just the tip of the iceberg.

I blame this sad state of affairs on black women for not supporting and standing up for other black women. It's a shame. A black man would never jump behind a black woman if the situation were even able to be reversed. Incidentally, it's not.

To be totally fair, I will say that all of the facts aren't out and it's perfectly understandable to reserve judgement until they are. I just do not understand a woman's thought process behind: She must have done something to provoke him.

10 comments:

  1. amen, hard pill to swallow in our community..but we are still in denial that we do many of the things you just listed.

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  2. These are not kids, just not adults. When I was younger I got into a lot of heated arguements and some went physical. To me, it's just the nature of being young, energetic, and emotional.

    My mother didn't just sit me down and explain how to handle myself in different situations....how to sell your point, how to re-reel-in a lost love by words, how to handle a cheating man. So some lessons came hard learned, some not so. just living helps you to read people, and that slight knowledge helps you know how much of yourself to give.

    I can't fully agree with you yet Smoke, because that statement was bull. I really want Chris vindicated. I don't like Rihanna - never did, and I don't want her tarnishing his promising future. said it.

    You're right, I can't begin to imagine her trying to fight a man hell-bent on bashing her head in, so I won't. I'd rather just state I am a fan of Chris' and leave it at that.

    I will, however, chunk the duece to Chris if he punched her balled fist or tried to hurt her. no excuses. it's bubblegum music anyway, I can live without Chris brown.

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  3. I was young and crazy too. I had my share of scuffles at the hands of boys who didn't know how to handle a feisty woman without getting physical. Yeah, I got hit for TALKING reckless -- and I immediately filed charges. I don't know about other woman, but a man's fists HURT and I did not want to ever feel that again. I learned a lesson and he learned a bigger one. I've also had a guy to push the heck out of me when I wanted to act crazy and throw my little hands at him. I got the point. He didn't have to just whip my butt for me to understand.

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  4. I feel a man should never put his hands on a women. Never Ever. Just walk away. Even if she is all in his face finger and all. If she is hitting on you or acting all crazy then push her ass down and keep it moving. Never let it get to the point where you have to cause bruises to her face or bite marks.

    I must also say that I read the speculation that this is not the first time he has put her hands on her. If that statement is true then the incident that took place that morning is Rhianna's fault. Because as the saying goes if he hits you once, hes gonna hit you again.I have delt with friends in abusive realatoinships that they just keep going back to. I have left those females alone. It alludes me and makes me angry that females would want to stay with someone who verbally, physically, or mentally, abuses you? You must love yourself first and know that no human being on this earth is worth losing your self to. I must also say that if that statement is not true and it is the first time. I hope they both get help. I hope she doesnt resume a relationship with him.

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  5. I dont know if I agree with you on this one or completly, everything I've heard so far is speculation, that is of course with the exception of his aunt speaking out.

    I havent seen a police report, I havent seen a picture of Rhianna's 'horrific' bruises, I haven't seen a full picture of Chris to see if he was hit upside his head with a blackberry,all I have right now is speculations of what everybody thinks happened and why they think it happened.

    I'm not going to jump on anyone's side, I am however going to reserve my judgement until I get the full facts...I only do this mainly because I come from a crazy family of women that believe its okay to hit a man upside his head with a 1.vase 2. a big rock 3. glass bottles and ect. And honestly YES I am one of those women that believe if you put your hands on someone (anyone, man or woman) expect to catch some licks. Do I think its right for a MAN TO HIT A WOMAN, NO I DONT, but it should be vice versa.

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  6. And I never understood for the life of me why the abused keep going back to their mates...

    I've witnessed this with close friends and family members and I just dont get it, maybe someone who's been there can shed some light on that for me

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  7. Milly, I don't understand why they go back either. I think it's just something that you can't understand unless you are in it. Kinda like being a murderer.... How could they kill? lol

    I'll be glad when we hear all the facts re: CB and Rihanna!

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  8. Lol well I guess its one of those things I'll never understand then.

    I've been involved in helping out so many friends that were in abusive situations,and then to only to find out them bishes were back together with the fool that put his foot up their a$$...


    And yes SMOKIE yes I do want to hear the facts via CB and Rhi

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  9. This is the same mentality that allowed R Kelly to go free. Let's remember that everyone was so quick to blame the little "hot tailed girl" but no one felt like he had a greater responsibility being the adult. None of her paid off family members would come forward to testify. Black women will never get respect in this world until we learn to love and respect one another.

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  10. I don't know enough about this situation to speak specifically on it. I just know about my own personal history and generally speaking.

    My mother was hit repeatedly by my father when I was a child. They are still married going on 29 years. And nowadays, she defends him. It's a psychological thing and it's not as simple as saying the abused should walk away and the abuser should stop. Not simple at all.

    That being the case, simple biological difference say men should not hit women under any circumstance. Yes, some women are bigger than men but 9 times out of 10, the blow a man delivers will inflict more damage than any blow a woman would deliver. Real men show emotional self-control and discipline and walk away. For women, our strength lies elsewhere (I tend to think men win in the brute strength department but women win in the enduring strength department).

    Furthermore, a woman is a woman and not a child. In a grown up relationship, there is no such thing as "she was acting unruly so I up and hit her". Just no such thing.

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Just say what you feel!